Lovvers – Think

Lovvers are one of those bands i'd heard the name of like, EVERYWHERE, but never listened to. And in some ways, i'm a bit sad that i've caught them on this release. Because i've just had have my ears raped listening to this badly produced dirge (titled 'Think'). I really wanted to replace the word 'Dirge' with the word 'Shit', but really i feel i should at least explain myself, otherwise i'd be one of those journalists who insults, not criticizes. I'd like to state that im not going to rant about the songs, but about the album and how it sounds, which is part of my job.

Rant Starts:

I don't care how "underground" or "cool" you are or pretend to be, if you want to release something, don't record it in a bin on purpose so you can sound "cool" and "underground". Please don't spit your vocals out into an amazing microphone, then spend 200 hours adding crap reverb and distorting it so it sounds like you sung it into your little sisters toy karaoke machine. I understand that there's a certain "effect" or a "vibe" (so many inverted commas, but it needs doing) that Lovvers are going for here, but unless its sounding like a Ramones album played out of a Ramones arsehole through a tape walkman, then they've failed. When you listen to an album, you expect the album to be listenable, not something that sounds like it cost ten pounds to make. With so much free music these days, making a collection of songs that are almost ruined by the production and then expecting people to pay for them doesn't seem like a smart business move. And don't anyone give me that 'Punk Spirit' crap. The Sex Pistols reformed and sold out (again), and The Ramones were never that good. Get over it. And if you're reading this, and you consider yourself a true punk, you'd know that only the fake pricks with the ripped vests and crap hair who think The Ramones were a punk band will be offended by my previous statements. So more love to you.

Rant Ends. Reasoned Argument Starts:

I bet Lovvers are really good live. Like, really good. I haven't seen them yet, but i'm going to soon, and i bet i'll write a review saying how good they are. And their songs, i reckon, are incredible live. Really full of power and stuff. Even though this is my first Lovvers experience, i can glean enough from the music and from what i read/hear on the web/grapevine to tell this. But the quality of this album is almost enough to put me off this band altogether. I would write about each of the songs if they didn't all sound like one big drunken mess. I would give you examples of lyrics if i could even understand what the fuck the singer is saying. This album has been on repeat 5 times in a row, and i'm not even close to liking it. And its under twenty minutes long. If i bought this online, i'd be getting charged 79p a song, the longest being 2 minutes 36, and the shortest a meager 1 minute 26. If you're going to write short, sharp shocks o'punky lovin, at least make them value for money.

I'm going to choose not to listen to anymore releases from this band, because i want to form a judgement on this band based on their live performance, their persona and their passion for the craft. And while i can't rate this album badly because of its production, i also can't rate it highly because of its production. So this album/E.P./Whatever will only get half marks, because its only half good. It's potential, but nothing more, and sadly slightly wasted. Old Lovvers fans might lovve (couldn't resist, again) this, it might be just what they were expecting, but to virgin ears, this is much more of a turn-off rather than a turn-on to what could be a very talented band indeed.
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