Hot Panda – Volcano… Bloody Volcano

In emulation of classic Pitchfork’s worst excesses, I present you with: Hot Panda Volcano”¦ Bloody Volcano, an epistolary review in six aborted fragments, and one somewhat successful, attempt:Dear Hot Panda,You are a band from Canada who sound kind of ‘quirky’, I guess, only actually not, you just sort of sound quirky at first glance, I mean-<start over> Dear Hot Panda,You sound kind of like Wolf Parade, this is mostly due to the synths thing you have going on, and the way it works with the rest of the music, though I guess that’s not a really particularly good comparison... because you sound kind of more ‘quirky’ than that, I mean, that’s not really a good word so I don’t really know how to describe the way you sound really but I do like it and-<screw up paper, start over> Dear Hot Panda,Yourselves, being a band and thus already well aware of how you yourself sound, are from Canada and have a debut album out called Volcano”¦ Bloody Volcano and your name is Hot Panda and-<tear up pieces of letter into fragments, start over> Dear Hot Panda,I really like your songs ‘Cold Hands/Chapped Lips’ and ‘Whale-Headed Girl’, amongst others. Often it throws me how your main singer can often sound uncannily like Jack White but most of the time doesn’t, which is a bit weird, especially as you really don’t sound much like the White Stripes, only you do sort of more sometimes but maybe that’s not a very good sound for you? I mean, you know how you sound already so I-<tear up pieces of letter into smaller, angrier fragments, start over> Dear Hot Panda,I, being a music writer who have listened to your debut album Volcano”¦ Bloody Volcano and given it some consideration, have decided, myself, to be a fan of it, though I do have some problems with it. For example it can seem overlong, despite not really being that long, it’s one of ‘those’ albums you know. Well, I don’t really know why I’m telling you that, er”¦ its not like its something you really can or particularly need to fix, like I said it’s a perfectly good album I don’t really know why I’m bringing it up really-<burn letter, start over> Dear Hot Panda,Permit me to bring a matter to your consideration. In my attempts to review your debut album, Volcano”¦ Bloody Volcano, (which I’ve found a very pleasurable to listen as a matter of fact, and that’s not just me trying to flatter you into assisting me here, that’s really what I think) for the music website ‘The Line of Best Fit’, which I am (appropriately enough!) a writer for, I have floundered in matters of elaborating on-<run over letter with heavy object and bury it in woods where prying eyes of civilization will never glance upon it, start over> Dear Hot Panda,I quite like your album and think other people should listen to your music. Here’s a picture I’ve drawn of a panda looking hot: :)Yours,Tom Whyman The Line Of Best Fit75%